Guys, this is no joke. As I’m writing this blog, my child is “playfully” yelling in her crib & refusing to go to bed. Before you think, “Gosh, what a horrible mom! She just leaves her child crying in her crib?!” Don’t worry, she’s been fed, rocked, sang to, her diaper has been changed & according to her video monitor, she’s just sticking her arms & legs in & out of the crib spindles. Parenting is FUN ya’ll (can you hear the sarcasm?)
Jordan and I have been parents to our sweet little Quincy Rose for a little over a year, which means we’re 100% EXPERTS on the topic of parenthood & all things children. Can you hear the crickets? OBVIOUSLY, I’m kidding…I still feel like 99% of the time I’m second guessing each and every decision I make. The measly little 1% of my decisions that I don’t think twice about…pouring that glass of wine after a long freaking day! Am I right or am I right?
Instead of listening to me babble on about what it means to be a mama (I’ll save that for a later blog post), I thought it’d be interesting to hear from a dad’s perspective. Jordan is not one to sugar coat anything so prepare your faces. We’re about to get elbow deep in the nitty-gritty of being a parent, specifically a dad.
They say there’s no preparing to become a parent, but what do you feel like you did to TRY and prepare?
Outside of making sure we had all the necessities for little Quincy’s arrival, I can honestly say I didn’t do a whole lot to prepare myself for what was to come. When people would tell me, my life was going to change I thought, “Not shit! I’m about to have a kid!” Looking back, I realized that when people say your life is about to change they meant more than the obvious of having a child to nurture and care for. Outside of getting one of those pretend babies that randomly cries and simulates what having a baby was going to be like, I honestly don’t know of anything that could have prepared me for baby number one.
I mean how do you prepare for waking up at 11pm, 1am, 3am, and 5am to a crying baby that is trying to adjust to the world around her? How do you prepare for a baby that is struggling to latch on to mom? How do you prepare for a screaming child that is inconsolable? The answer that I came up with is I can’t prepare for any of those situations. So if anyone has any good practice tips I am all ears!
With all of that being said, I also couldn’t prepare for the amount of love that I was going to have for my little girl. I absolutely love my wife, family, and friends, but the love that I feel for a little human that I helped create doesn’t compare to any feeling I’ve ever experienced. All of a sudden (even though it took some getting used to) my wants changed. I now had this little nugget that I needed to give my all to. I spent a good portion of this answering question what the tough times were like, but I also could never have imagined what the other side of those first few months were going to be like and that it makes being a parent so worth it!
What is something that you were NOT prepared for?
Those first poopy diapers. I mean as she’s grown they’ve been pretty gnarly, but those tarry poops, in the beginning, are not cool man! Also, I was not prepared for the first time I had to give her a bath all by myself!
If you could give expecting parents a piece of an advice, what would it be?
Have a plan for when the baby is inconsolable! The best thing we came up with was tagging ourselves in and out during those moments. The biggest mistake I made was feeling like, as her dad, I should be able to get her to calm down and when I couldn’t I would get frustrated. I have a lot more respect for single parents out there that do this on their own. The other thing I will say is that those first few months might have been tough, but they were just a small moment in time and it has been well worth it.
What is your favorite part of having a daughter?
At this point, I’m not sure what my favorite part of having a daughter is because I don’t have anything to compare against it. At times she can be sensitive so I have to be very conscious of that, which I think has helped me be more aware of my tone and how I respond to not only her but Michaela as well. I know that having her has helped me take a deeper look at myself which has helped me strive to be the best I can be.
What has been the most challenging part of being a parent?
One of the most challenging parts of being a parent for me is when she wakes up in the middle of the night. I very rarely have a tough time going to sleep initially, but once I get woken up it is incredibly difficult for me to fall back asleep. As I type this, it is currently 8:20 pm and I have been up since 1:30 am due to miss Quincy Rose waking up last night.
Also, I would have to say being patient has proven to be quite a challenge. Patience has certainly been a character defect of mine for quite some time (probably my whole life from what I can remember), but not being able to calm her down and her not being able to tell me why she is fussing has proven to be challenging.
What is your favorite memory with Quincy Rose so far?
UHHHHHHHHH ALL OF THEM! I’m not sure I can pick one memory, partly because my memory is the worst, but also because this year has flown by and it feels like all of this has blended together. If I HAVE to pick, I would say the rare times when she snuggles with me. Or when I lean in to give her a kiss & she leans in, but headbutts me instead. It has sort of become our thing, headbutting. Obviously, extremely gentle!
What has been your FAVORITE part of being a dad?
I never knew I would love her as much as I do! Seeing her light up in the morning when I go grab her from her crib, listening to her babble through the monitor or even when I go to pick her up in the evening, she gets the biggest smile when I walk in the door. Now that she can walk, it’s multiplied because she B-lines it straight for me!
Any final thoughts you’d like to share?
None that I can think of now, but I’m sure being up since 1:30 am isn’t helping, but the wife is cracking the whip and needs this done so I managed to push through! The things we do for family!
Whoa…I had NO idea how deep Jordan was going to get with his answers. Man, he is such an incredible dad, with SO much freaking love & laughter to give. Not going to lie, I teared up quite a bit while writing this blog. And chuckled, because his last answer was so sassy, typical Jordan.
Being an adult can be hard, being married can be REALLY hard, but being a parent…it’s definitely been the most difficult role I’ve ever had. I thank the good Lord every day that I have such a great support in Jordan when the days get long & hard.
Cheers to all the dads out there, but an EXTRA special cheers to my baby daddy!